Friday, June 27, 2014

One Good Mug of Coffee

I'm an impulsive guy. I buy things that I don't need, make snap decisions without thinking, And man oh man do I eat when I'm not hungry.

I'm okay in the morning. I've stopped making coffee out of habit. I'm deliberate. I press fresh-roasted beans from Recess for one mug of exquisite, strong coffee and savor it. But that's about the last food or drink that I truly savor each day.

I'm looking to track my impulses and slow down. I let our Amazon Prime expire so shopping is less convenient. I write my way through decisions. Next project: eating.

I eat from habit not hunger. Twice yesterday I ate cookies because it was time to eat cookies, like there's a schedule to follow.

The last few weeks I have gone to bed feeling stuffed and haven't slept well. My eating habits are making me feel lousy and tired.

Waking is a trigger for coffee, but these days I decide if I want coffee or not. I'm in control because I'm aware and present. I want more of that in my life.

Today, I'll examine my eating to go beyond habit and have control. If I lose some weight, great, but the goal is to be deliberate, not thin.

I just sipped at the bottom third of my coffee. Delicious. I decided to have one mug of coffee this morning and I'm happy with that decision. Later, I might make more, but not to substitute for food I'm trying not to eat. I'll make coffee if and only if I want coffee. That's the awareness I'm after.

It's the kind of presence I have in revision. I draft without much thought to how the words will sound. Revising, I'm deliberate, aware and present. I work to satisfy specific needs. I savor each bite and chew every word carefully. I've finished that good cup of coffee now. Rather than drink more out of some obligation to habit, I'll savor that last taste, revise my life a bit more, and then write on.